The Counter-Intuitive Approach to Standing Out as a Leader

Do you want to be a great leader?

Then work to become “invisible.”

Mark Bertolini, co-CEO of Bridgewater and former CEO of Aetna, advocates for a “Taoist” leadership approach.

He describes 4 levels of Taoist leadership:

1. Your employees hate you.

2. They fear you.

3. They praise you.

4. You become invisible.

In his view, leaders should aspire to become invisible. When this happens, leaders have “created enough of an ethos in the organization that the organization can carry itself forward.”

In the first 3 levels, employees depend on their leaders for success. The competence of leadership determines the ceiling of results employees achieve.

A level 4 leader has built a powerful organization or team that is independent of its leader and capable of far greater accomplishments.

A level 4 leader in this framework creates conditions for employees to leverage their talents and shine. They put in the work to build a great organization, empower employees, and get out of the way.

In my experience, few leaders aspire to become “invisible”. Many more want to be the center of attention.

Counterintuitively, you can set yourself apart from other leaders by seeking to become more invisible, but it requires you to be selfless.

Being a selfless leader is difficult.

What holds us back from becoming selfless leaders?

It’s hard to trust others with our success.

We know what we’re capable of doing.

If we’re meticulous about the details, can we really trust others to be just as vigilant?

Or, we’re great at delivering presentations that inform and influence decision-makers. We know exactly how to structure our PowerPoint slides, what words to use, and how to react to questions. We can read the room. Can my team member pull that off?

Maybe we’re critical thinkers, can see the challenges in ideas, and are usually right about what will work and what won’t. Should we really take a risk on our colleague’s out-of-the-box idea?

There are risks in trusting others and we have faith in ourselves.

It seems easier to make all the important decisions, deliver the critical presentations, and check every document to ensure that no mistakes are made.

So, we adopt a controlling, top-down leadership style. And it gets results…to a point.

The problem is, there’s a cap on the impact we can achieve through this leadership approach. We become a bottleneck and constrain performance.

In the worst versions of this style, we lead through fear. Fear motivates our teams to play it safe or leave for greener pastures.

We want to be admired by others.

It’s human nature to want to be valued by others.

At the very least, we want to be respected and appreciated. Some want to be adored or even worshiped.

The temptation is to make leadership about us -

“Look what I accomplished.”

“She’s such an amazing leader!”

“He’s brilliant.”

We’re tempted to take credit for our team’s successes, but not the blame for its failures.

When there’s a spotlight, we take it while our team works behind the scenes. We hoard talent because we’re afraid to let the good ones go.

Our teams become reliant on us for direction - Why should they show initiative if they won’t get the credit?

Because their exposure and experiences are limited, their development suffers. What’s the point of building capabilities that will never see the light of day?

Employees become more focused on pleasing the “great leader” than achieving the team’s or organization’s purpose.

How can we overcome these barriers?

Shift from short-term thinking to long-term thinking.

When we have a short-term mindset, it’s easier to do the job ourselves to get the results we want.

We don’t spend time developing our teams because we have a long list of things that need to get done now. Developing teammates would slow us down.

With a long-term view, we realize we will limit our impact unless we’re able to build a strong team. We must place trust in others, coach, and mentor them in order to strengthen the team.

That means delegating tasks before we’re 100% sure team members are ready. It means learning from mistakes rather than achieving perfection. And, it means allowing some ideas to move forward even when our gut says they won’t work.

There’s short-term suffering, but long-term rewards because in the future, the team will be stronger.

Move from “it’s all about me” to “it’s all about our purpose”.

When “it’s all about me”, I’m the center of attention and employees focus on pleasing me.

Imagine if team members focused on achieving the team’s purpose instead. They’d be more willing to question me and provide feedback if it served our purpose.

Team members would be more likely to be creative and take risks. They’d feel more responsible and accountable.

And we’d achieve stronger results.

A team should understand how it fits within the broader organization and adds value. It should have a clear purpose. Most people want to be part of something meaningful.

Contributing to a worthy team purpose is much more motivating than pleasing one person.

So, if you want to distinguish yourself as a leader, take the time to hire and develop a team that ultimately won’t need you. Fight against your instincts to micromanage the work and learn to trust the team you’re building.

Focus on creating a compelling purpose for your team’s work and connecting your teammates to it. This approach goes against our instincts, but in the long run enables higher levels of success than fear-based or “me” centered approaches to leadership.

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